Maybe some of you saw this recent Onion feature and thought, "I know someone like that . . ."
How about a little test for deciding if your enthusiasm for breadmaking is a cause for alarm:
1. I bake enough bread to _____.
a. Feed myself (1 pt)
b. Feed myself and my family (2 pts)
c. Feed myself, my family, and the family next door (4 pts)
d. Feed myself, my family, the family next door, and all my co-workers (10 pts)
2. I have created ____ spreadsheets to calculate baker's percentages.
a. zero (1 pt)
b. 1 (2 pts)
c. >1 (4 pts)
3. If a forum post fails to include a crumb shot, I _______.
a. notice but refrain from commenting (1 pt)
b. comment on its absence (2 pts)
c. skip the thread entirely (4 pts)
4. King Arthur Flour _______.
a. is kinda pricey (1 pt)
b. is worth the investment (2 pts)
c. doesn't offer the complexity and depth of flavor offered by organic flour ground in my hand-cranked mill (4 pts)
5. Commercial yeast is ______.
a. perfectly acceptable (1 pt)
b. okay for beginners (2 pts)
c. heresy in a jar; when I travel to visit family, I bring my wild yeast starter (4 pts)
5-8 points = you're a practical baker who may even slice a loaf before it has cooled.
9-12 points = people regard your baking as a healthy pastime, but know better than to praise Panera in your presence.
13-16 points = everyday life intrudes on your breadmaking.
17-26 points = the folks at TFL are the only ones who really understand you ;-)
* no, not that kind.