The Fresh Loaf

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nbicomputers's picture
nbicomputers

more true stories

It was a dark and stormy Night!!!

No just messing with you. 

A little description is required before I continue

 This shop was big. At one time it was a movie house.  The front was converted into a store and the back the kitchen. 
Connecting the two parts was a ramp that would go down from the kitchen to the store.  I have to sat the ramp was a little slippery and kind of steep.  There was no problem as long as you were careful

It was two days before thanksgiving, one of the busiest times of year for a bakery.  All the bakers were there as well as the owner. 
In this bakery the owner was just that, the owner.   He was not a baker and even though I was the head baker in charge of the kitchen this guy thought he knew everything. In fact he was the type of person that would not listen to anything because ,well after all he was the boss. 

I had just finish an oven of lemon meringue pie and the trays were on a rack cooling.  This was a full rack 12 pans 6 pies on a pan. Well it was then the boss comes running into the kitchen yelling about some order that the packers were doing and they were missing a couple of things one of them was a lemon meringue pie.   I tell him their is  no problem and everything they need is here in the kitchen cooling.

Come with me I say and I turn to pick up a tray so I could give him the few missing items for the order to take down to the store.  I Turn Around  and start to walk over to the back of the kitchen where most of the baked products were placed to cool because it was the coldest part of the kitchen.

It was then I hear from the other side of the kitchen the owner saying something like “we don’t have any of these in the store.  I’ll take them"

I quickly turned around and see to my horror  the owner taking the rack of still hot lemon meringues.  He was breaking one of the first safety rule I learned  PULL--DON’T --PUSH!!!      

I yell at him to stop and I start running after him but with all the work that was being done the floor was a little wet and slippery so I could not catch him. 

Well he got to the start of the ramp and it was all over. 

The weight of the rack (it was an old type and very heavy) plus the weight of the pans plus the weight of the pies weighed more than he did.  WELL HE WAS HOLDING ON TO THE RACK FOR HIS LIFE.  This was a chain reaction and there was no stopping the inveditable.   The rack started down the ramp with the owner in tow   His feet planted firmly on the ground trying to stop the runnaway truck but he had  no chance.  down the rack went the owner with it sliding like a skater on ice.  A steady stream of obscenities came yelling out of his mouth and filled the air like the smell of burnt sugar. 

The last thing I heard him say was oh F*)@!@##$.    AND THEN IT HAPPENED!!!    At the base of the ramp was a piece of saddle. You know the thick piece of wood that separates two rooms.  Well the rack hit it and stopped as if someone had pressed the emergency brake, ---- well stopped is not exactly right it stop moving forward but the momentum and the top weight cause the pies to slip forward   that with the angle of the ramp was enough.   Slowly but unstoppable down went the rack followed by the pies followed by the owner.

Did I forget to mention he was wearing a suit. 

A Good suit.!!!

He had bought the bakery as an investment and had just stopped by on his way to his real job… An attorney , A district attorney on his way to the Bronx county court house.

The rack did break his fall but when he went to roll off the rack he ended up on his back covered in warm lemon pie.

All we could do was look. There was lemon meringue everyware. on the floor, on the rack on the owner,  bent trays everything  everytime the owner tried to get up he would slip on this great mess and fall right back doun into more lemon cream flopping around like a newly caught fish just out of the water.

I couldn’t work for an hour since I could not stop laughing.

For the rest of the day when a customer came in and asked for a lemon pie we just started laughing all over again right at the customer who thought we Had lost our minds.  We couldn’t  help it.   And when we would recover enough to tell the customer the story both of us would by laughing so hard we would be crying.  

Anybody that came in that day for a lemon pie got a free ¼ pound of cookies and a story.    

As I SAID YOU JUST CAN"T MAKE THIS STUFF UP!!!!

Paddyscake's picture
Paddyscake

what a great story!! fully visual description, you couldn't have scripted a better comedy skit!! I don't know which was was funnier, the earthquake or this one. If you have any more..I'm looking forward to them. Thank you  for all the baking advice you've been contributing. Glad you are one of our regulars!!

Tulcat's picture
Tulcat

Thanks for sharing

cnlindon's picture
cnlindon

Also, thanks for sharing your years of experience with us.

 

-Chad 

tallchicksrule's picture
tallchicksrule

that is by far one of the funniest stories i've heard in awhile! thanks for sharing!

edh's picture
edh

Norm,

I've been enjoying the benefits of your professional advice greatly, but these stories are tops! Keep 'em coming, hoss; you're making all of our days much brighter.

Thank you!

edh

mammiesbaker's picture
mammiesbaker

Great Story! I too am enjoying all your comments and recipes.

holds99's picture
holds99

Norm,

You are an amazing storyteller.  That's a terrifically funny story... in the same league as the previous one about the Duchess.  Like I told you, you should produce a bakery sitcom like Cheers.  I could mentally see that cart going down the ramp and hitting the piece of saddle and stopping abruptly as pans and pies continued through mid-air.  And it happened to a lawyer no less...talk about true justice. 

Howard

KipperCat's picture
KipperCat

LOL!  I think we've all had a boss like that at one time or another. Reading this was just what I needed on a gloomy day.