October 30, 2011 - 3:13pm
Hercule Poirot on Mass-Produced British Meat Pies
I can almost hear myself saying the same thing about today's mass-produced "bread-tasting substances":
Hastings: Miss Lemon says he (Benedict Farley, British Meat Pie Tycoon) makes pies.
Poirot: Makes pies?
Hastings: Yes, pies.
Poirot: Hastings, to say that Benedict Farley makes pies is like saying that Richard Wagner wrote semiquavers.
Hastings: They are good pies, are they?
Poirot: No, horrible! But there are a great many of them...
The more things change, the more they stay the same.
I love the Hercule Poriot tv series and can just see the rotund little fellow with that supercillious look on his face saying that. Its sort of how I feel about commercial pies. There are so many of them and most of them are horrid!
I was shopping this weekend, and looking for a particular item and while perusing the appliance section in Sears store, came across an item that fits with the pies theme, its called a MY PIE baker. Its like a sandwich grill or waffle iron in that its got a top plate and a bottom plate, with dimples on each that make PIES I didn't open a box and read the directions, but expect you make the dough, place the dough into the deep wells on the bottom, fill and place a top crust on, the crust obviously swells up into the top dimple (shallow) and bakes it into a pie. Talk about over kill! I can do the same with foil tins and my regular oven!
Of course they didn't have a pizzle iron but they did have panni presses (my original waffle iron (electric) had plates you turned over to make them) and all the George Forman and other grill makes, even a fancy stone grill with alcohol lights that you can grill at the table with, but not a single pizzle or krumcake iron to be found. They even had a special oven for countertop use to make deep fried potatoes without actually frying them, it uses a tablespoon of oil! ??? I cannot even think of that! Wonder if it does doughnuts too? Fritters? fried cookies???
...at Sears this summer.
I don't know why I found myself there, but it was fascinating.
Like you say, the selection was enormous, both broad and deep. Every variation of every applicance was on offer. HOW MANY TYPES TOASTERS CAN ONE STORE POSSIBLY SELL?!
I found the Wet/Dry ShopVac particularly funny. First the giant 40 gallon one; but, if that's too big, then how about 35 gallon version? Or 30? 20? 10? 5? and 1 gallon personal size! It was like a display of Matryoshka dolls, but with ShopVacs.
Too bad the selection is inversely proportional to the number of people shopping there; essentiually, no one.
How does Sears stay in business?
A couple of days ago, Business Insider ran a story on the chains most likely to go out of business by 2013, and Sears was one of the ten.