End of Baking Days
Over the years, many people have said to me that I have all the luck: loving husband, respectful, bright children, fulfilling career in a fun-filled industry, health and a relatively comfortable life. So when I took a voluntary separation package at the end of last year, it might have seemed that my luck had stalled. I never for a second believed that: I had been feeling so burned out at my last workplace that I felt more than half a year of paid vacation was exactly what I needed at this point in my life.
With my retraining allowance, I signed up for short breadmaking and pastry courses at SFBI. I jetted back and forth from the Midwest to the West Coast to spend long stretches of quality bonding time with my parents, siblings and children. I travelled to my childhood hometown in Asia and spent a month there visiting relatives and friends, feeling for the first time in a long time like the carefree child that I was when I lived there. Back at home, I went on a bread and pastry self-enrichment extravaganza- with occasional detours in chocolate and ice cream, tackling recipes that I didn't have the time and confidence to make before. I am proud to say that I have come out this last 10 months happier, wiser, richer in non-material things.
My lazy, hazy days are coming to a close. I have a solid offer and another one in the works, both back in the big, cosmopolitan city that was home to me for the greater part of my life.... Maybe that's why lately I have been baking more frenzily than usual. Yesterday's bake yielded the below.
The banetton-risen bread is from Janedo's recipe of Pane de Genzano; the loaf is cinnamon-raisin using the sourdough challah recipe I found on this site.
Below is my attempt at the Pearl Bakery's (Maggie Gleazer, Artisan Baking) fig-anise panini. It has a definite tang from the starter, and the bread is hearty with a dense crumb and hard crust. The anise gives it a heady aroma and the figs some sweetness but the bread itself is not sweet.
I prefer Columbia's Sweet Perrin, also from Artisan Baking.
The bread contains plenty of firm pears (mine came from a friend's tree), figs, and Brazilian nut instead of hazelnuts. The crumb and crust are soft just as I like them. The fruit and nut combination makes this bread a delightful snacking treat.
Maybe I'll make panetonne today.
Comments
... and the outcome of what must have been quite a busy day! I can understand that you are baking as much as you can now before your professional life takes over again (hopefully not too much). I am a college professor and my baking activity is always much more intense in my free summer months than during the semesters.
Yes, it was one busy day, Choute22! I only had 4 different types of bread but without the procedures and timers placed strategically near the dough, I wouldn't know which one was up. Don't know how they do it in the bakery. And doesn't it somehow pain you to be baking so much with the AC on? But we will have to indulge in our passion.
With loaves looking like that perhaps you should reconsider your true calling...
Gorgeous breads!
Did you cut slits for the ribbon prior to final proofing? Is so, how did you know how much slack to leave so they didn't interfere with the rise or final shape?
Larry
Larry,
I did very briefly think about going into baking. With the advice of SCORE volunteers and my career coach, I researched about the subject and realized that my whole lifestyle would change drastically. I very much love what I did for a living- I just wasn't in the right work environment. With the new opportunities ahead, I hope to be able to do both passions.
For the twine, I laid 2 separate strings down to form a cross. I then placed the boule on top of the strings, finally making a tie on the top surface. I just left maybe the height of my index and middle fingers together between the top surface of the unrisen boule and the knot. As you can see, the twine has cut into the boule so that the final shape after rising is as you see it in the picture. -- cake diva
Beautiful story and baking, cake diva! Your baking does express your happiness!
Sylvia
And I am a firm believer that our spirit and frame of mind sometimes get transferred by way of our creations. I'll continue watching for you here. --- cake diva
I have enjoyed your many artful posts. I do hope you will find a way to continue what you obviously enjoy. The wisdom gained with age allows one to recognise quality of life as the true measure of ones existence.
Eric
That is quite a day's baking! Beautiful breads and such a variety. I'm just getting started with artisan breads and I'm impressed with all of yours.
Catherine
Catherine,
I started baking bread in January. I can remember the anxiety since I had not baked bread before. I did have the benefit of attending Artisanal 1 at SFBI but that was only by accident. I did not know then what I was doing.
With advice received from TFL'ers and with practice, I have not only gotten beyond the trepidation, but also developed some intuition over raw material and process considerations as well as dough attributes. It's been fun... You are in good hands here. -- cake diva
Eric,
When I was younger and consumed with raising my family and growing my career, I had the tendency of dismissing those words of wisdom as platitudes that make you feel good for a while, and then you forget soon as you put the Hallmark card back in the rack. Only after I had had some rough sailing myself and saw people succumbing to physical and emotional ailments did I realize that it is true what they say- that life is short and we have the power to do something about how we choose to live it. It has been a very liberating epiphany for me.-- cake diva
"If I had two loaves of bread, I would sell one and buy flowers for my soul."
I think, in the last ten months, you've baked enough bread that you'll have fresh bouquets each new day in the years ahead.
David G
Thank you for your kindness.-- cake diva
Thank you for writing so openly and freshly about a dilemma we all face -- the clamoring, competitive push-pull of all the loves of our lives including a deep, undeniable, some would say compulsive passion for baking.
I wonder if your relationship with baking will continue and just erupt in new and interesting ways. That's what seems to be happening as I go through big and somewhat unsettling changes in my life and career. In the words of Edward Espe Brown in his intro to this year's revised edition of the Tassajara Bread Book: "You and the dough -- ripening, maturing, baking, blossoming together."
And now I'm giggling. Because my brain is saying (after E.E. Brown's simile).." and then you get eaten". LOL. But seriously, hang in there. You have the strength, though you may not realize it.--- cake diva
for the non-material things. Yes, you do have all the luck and it continues..good for you, be happy!
Betty
Your breads are beuatiful. I looking forward to trying Columbia's Sweet Perrin, when are figs are ripe.
And I am envious of those with fig trees. They don't grow here in Ohio, and they are worth their weight in gold in the grocery stores when you can find them,
i too took a separation package 4 years ago and now i focus on what i love doing: writing, translating and baking bread, in that order!
it's true, as you get older, what matters most is what you do instead of what you make (salary-wise, that is).
Hope your next job will satisfy you emotionally. It's good you have your baking skills to help balance corporate life.
as usual, cake diva, your breads (and photographs) are flawless. can i drop by for tea? hee-haw.
I also can cook and orchestrate a pleasing dinner.
I am feeling positive about my new prospects. Relocating to The Big City for one will provide us with the social interactions and entertainment options that were missing in the past 8 years. It's true what they say- all work and no play.....
Wishing you all the best in your new job, and may your new co-workers appreciate how lucky they are that you are a baker :-)
You would not believe how I have leveraged my baking skills to advance my projects. LOL! My samples get bumped up the work list, team members become more collaborative, and early morning meetings perk up when I bring goodies to work. I have witnessed coworkers fighting (seriously!) over the last slice of carrot cake or the crust on my apple pie. Too funny!
Although I have been baking bread for more than 30 years, I am new to TFL and Artisan Baking. I must say that it is people like YOU and so many others that have made it possible for me to find the courage to try loaves and styles I never thought I would! Not only that, but with this site and again, people like you, I have both my daughters started baking and my step grand-daughter!! It is SO fulfilling even to make the simplest of loaves!! I get Not only courage, but tips and recipes from members like you who not only share their breads, but some of their lives. I am now and will forever be grateful!
I am a Surgical Nurse and have been out of work for 4 months due to an injury, and have also baked my head off!! (As we say in the South). It has enriched not only my life, but those of my family and friends! I am hoping to go back to work in the next month, so I am just not sure yet how I am going to handle not being able to indulge my every baking whim!! As I type now, I have a loaf of Cracked Wheat bread starting to let off that aroma of home and health and Goodness!! I am FINALLY able to do some SERIOUS weaning of my family off those chemical filled, enriched with garbage and fake ingredients....the demon STORE BOUGHT BREADS!!! LOL...I am just LOVING it!!! As a nurse, I really feel good about what I am feeding my family!!!
God Bless you ALL!!!
Jannrn,
I blessed the day I stumbled into this site. I immediately felt camaraderie and support- strange in a way, because most people here have never met face to face. But I feel that if I were to one day meet the people here, it would be like I had known them all along. I know I will continue to look forward to surfing this site to see what everyone's up to.
My first degree is Nursing, but I immediately went back to school to go the Science route after I realized nursing wasn't a good fit for me. So I have a lot of respect for nurses. With your newfound baking skills, you might try sharing your handiwork with some of those surgeons with big egos. You'll be surprised how much nicer they will be. Be well! --- cake diva
Cake Diva
I know just what you mean about the camaraderie on this site! I have been made to feel SO welcome since my first post! There are alot of terms here that I have not heard of but NO ONE has made fun of me rather they have been so kind to explain things! I have even ordered the BBA!! I am so happy to be part of such a wonderful community!! As for the Surgeons...I have been a Travel Nurse the last 6 years and I am happy to tell you I won ALOT of them over and those egos....they learned to check those at the door the first day with me!!!
I do wish you much luck and look forward to more of your posts and pictures! I haven't had the confidence just yet to post pictures, but I WILL!!
Take care and God Bless!