I've made several loaves that could have doubled as doorstops.  I couldn't even get the birds to eat them.  I have also never been able to get a loaf to release from a towel.  I've taken to spraying with cooking spray and using plastic wrap.

I'd love to hear the story about the fish and the pumpernickel 

Floyd has posted quite a few!

Heck, he never even updated the Irish Soda Bread recipe with a non-outake version of photos!

I should have taken a photo of the loaf he made this weekend - he made the mistake of leaving it on a chair to rise *withing the reach of our two year old* who took advantage of a momentary lapse of supervision to come and poke a large number of holes in the dough with her finger.

p.s. say what? Please at least tell us more about the pumpernickle story!! haha 

in using trout and pumpernickle in the same sentence!  I didn't think the bread was that bad but I had a houseful of guests that begged to differ. Ouch, those septugenarians don't pull any punches!

Adding insult to injury, this ignorant fish and his buddies ate up stale wonder bread with relish but spit out and then refused to even look at my bread.

Trout / pumpernickle

Funny this thread should come up. With a 2 and a half year old son, I'm not quite able to attend to a good dough during the week, and usually bake on the weekend. But I decided to try a quicker bread yesterday, a whole wheat Irish Soda Bread from James Beard's 'Beard on Bread'. I've never made soda bread before, and I won't make this version again. It tasted like something you'd eat just to survive (hmm, maybe that's how it came into existence).

The recipe is simple:

3 cups whole wheat flour

1 cup all-purpose flour

2 tsp. salt (too much, by the way)

1 tsp. baking soda

3/4 tsp. baking powder

2 cups buttermilk

Mix dry ingredients, add buttermilk, mix and knead only 2 or 3 minutes to make a soft dough. Place in an oiled casserole or cake pan (or do a freeform loaf), cut a cross in the top, and bake at 375 for 35-40 minutes. See the result: http://tinyurl.com/2goknn

Many of the breads I've tried from that book are too salty, but even still it was dense and sort of dog biscuity. I thought the buttermilk would lighten it up, but no. Maybe a recipe using unbleached vs. whole wheat would taste better. I looked at Floyd's recipe mentioned above, but with egg and sugar added, it seems more like a nice quick bread than a traditional soda bread.

Does anyone have a recipe they would really recommend? Is this anyone's favorite non-yeasted bread?

Longing for the weekend,

Sue

This bread may taste good but is not the irish Soda bread with egg and butter. I have not make Irish soda bread before but if I were to try ,I would adopt the recipe from the bread bible by Rose levy Beranbaum .

Here's an example of my trying to do the NYT / Sullivan Street bread with all-whole wheat at 93% hydration. It ripped like the dickens comming out of the banneton, and never rose much. Nice big holes, though.



And here's a loaf of 85% hydration Desem that stuck something awful to the banneton. Looks like a cow patty from the top. Ick. Dense too. What's not to like?

I was so sure of my abilities that I just kept making brick after brick at 5700 feet in Prescott, AZ. My husband infuriated me by taking this picture, but I'm glad he kept it so I could share it with all of you. After he recorded my failures, I immediately threw all the bricks off the back deck into the canyon. The next morning they were gone and the javelinas must have had tummy aches!

High Altitude Bricks

Susan in San Diego

I've been feeding bread that looks something like that second loaf to family and friends on a pretty regular basis over the past year. Could that be why their visits are becoming less frequent?

It all started when we got one of those Food Savers they had been advertising on TV. Why, it even had one of those delicate settings for "fresh" foods, so's not to squish them. Or so it said. While I had the extra time, I made extra french bread. I usually wrap it well in Press-n-Seal, then tin foil, and then freeze it till I need it; which usually ain't long. So anyway, I leave my fresh loaves out to cool, and go to the store. My family wants to try out the new food saver....you can see where this is going can't you! IT TAKES THE AIR OUT OF STUFF PEOPLE!!!! What part of this wasn't clear to my family, I'm not quiet sure. When the first loaf went COMPLETELY FLAT, and would not re-poof,  why did they continue on, trying different settings till ALL the bread was FLAT!!Was there an UH-OH, she's gonna kill us? I guess I'll never know. After I got over it, I don't know what was funnier, the flat bread, the look on their faces, or the excuses they tried to come up with to explain what happened and who's fault it was. They all agreed that my son Quaid was the guilty party. He' 14 months old. I guess I'd rather not know.

                                                                               audra

That recipe looks more promising.  I'm going to try it soon, and I think I'll add currants or raisins too.  I'll let you all know how it comes out.

Sue 

Here is why I stick to bread

The cake was delicious, but it looked like it'd been through the blender.

and that cake looks like several GIANT crumbs under the dreamy frosting...so really it's perfect. (Is this the other side of the let's-all-pat-Floyd-on-the-back coin?)

the label says it all

I live in a large city and attempted to scatter the crumbs from this loaf to the pigeons. Even they wouldn't eat it.

 Hey All

I'm not seeing a whole lot of pictures, just allot of words, whats the deal?  Well for those of you feeling self-concious about swowing your mistakes let me lower the bar a little bit.  This is what happens to ciabatta that you don't dimple before baking.  This loaf attacked both of my kids and the cat before I could put it out of it's misery.

Da Crumb Bum

.

this was an attempt to make Reinhart's "Country Bread" recipe with whole wheat flour - it is supposed to have lots of nice holes. I count 2 in this one. I named it Quasimodo.

Because his ears are too big.

Sourdough NK view 3

I tried Floyd's bagels and they were delicious, but hidious looking, lol.  Weren't as pretty as his turned out.  They didn't seem to rise properly.  Were flatter but still delish!!!!!  I am from the north, living in KY.  Can't find any good bread around here so I have started making my own.  Not as hard as I thought, but it is an art form I am trying to master.  My husband has always said I can't bake, well, I have proved him wrong, even if they aren't as pretty as I would have liked.

Jerseygirl in Kentucky

Okay, Crummy, it's your turn to laugh! I tried making Eric's beautiful bread and THIS is what I end up with. Obviously not enough gluten development. Back to the drawing board.

Bird Bread

Susan

I hope all the pictured less than perfect loaves at least got the opportunity to be tasted before being pitched.  Otherwise, the birds might be eating too well........!

Sue 

Hello to all of my dough abusing bakers

Susan I am still trying to recover from the laughter.  I can still hear it echoing from my Ciabatta cavern.  By the way your loaf did not look all that bad.  Any of us who have baked a while have ALOT of out takes.  What does it say about those of us who photograph the good the bad and the ugly?  I'm sure a mental health professional would have a hey day with me.  I actually need a few of these out takes to avoid "oven springs" ugly cousin "ego spring".  My guess is I will have a few more pics in the future that will feel right at home here.

Da Crumb Bum    

I havent got any photos, but I KNOW I have had many pancake loaves and bricks. :S

 I could almost build a god kennel with the bricks my oven has birthed and only the unintentional flatbreads outnumber the bricks.

I am so glad I have moved beyond that point.  Thank goodness for gluten flour!

I'll definitely take pictures in the future. This whole thread has been too fun! 

A photo wouldn't do justice to the chocolate cake I made - it looked fine.  I love a bit of chili pepper in chocolate, so decided to add some to the cake.  Well, I used chipotle.  The combination of smoky chili taste with a slightly burned cake didn't go over well at all with DH.  Though a confirmed chocolate-lover like me still managed to eat quite a bit of it.