The essential problem with white bread...
... is that when you combine 8 thick slices (broken into pieces) with 1 cup of sugar, 1/4 cup of butter, 1 tablespoon vanilla, 3 eggs, and 2 cups of whole milk and bake it at 400 F for 30 minutes, it turns into bread pudding!
I've discovered this problem recently, and now I must spend another 4 hours a week on my bike to rid myself of the calories.
This is most distressing.